


I Can't Decide

by Stujet9rainshine



Series: We are Andersons After All [4]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Android Gavin Reed, Android Hank Anderson, Anorexia, Autistic Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Canon-Typical Violence, Drug Abuse, Eating Disorders, F/M, Gun Violence, Human Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Human CyberLife Tower Connor | RK800-60 (Detroit: Become Human), Human Upgraded Connor | RK900, M/M, Minor Character Death, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Prostitution, Smoking, Violent Android Revolution (Detroit: Become Human), reverse au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-08
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:26:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 19,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23059213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stujet9rainshine/pseuds/Stujet9rainshine
Summary: Connor liked to think he was good at his job. He got things done. He worked all the extra hours. He was always trying to be pleasant to be around. Though most of the time, he knew he wasn’t.Sure, he smoked too much and made a lot of bad decisions in his personal life. But he was a good cop!Detective work was virtually the only thing he was consistently good at. Or so he had thought, but here was Amanda doing the one thing he’d begged her not to.As a result, standing in front of Connor was his new partner. An android partner at that.
Relationships: CyberLife Tower Connor | RK800-60/Original Character(s), Hank Anderson/Connor, Josh/Markus/North/Simon (Detroit: Become Human), Upgraded Connor | RK900/Gavin Reed
Series: We are Andersons After All [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1193173
Comments: 23
Kudos: 168





	1. HK800

**Author's Note:**

> Strolls in 15 months late with a cold brew.
> 
> Holy fuck guys. It's actually that time.
> 
> I've decided it's time.

Connor liked to think he was good at his job. He got things done. He worked all the extra hours. He was always trying to be pleasant to be around. Though most of the time, he knew he wasn’t.

_ Sure,  _ he smoked too much and made a lot of bad decisions in his personal life.  _ But he was a good cop! _

Detective work was virtually the only thing he was consistently good at. Or so he had thought, but here was Amanda doing the one thing he’d begged her not to.

As a result, standing in front of Connor was his new partner. An  _ android  _ partner at that.

The android in question was like no other Connor had ever seen before. He was made to look older, he had a trimmed beard and chin-length silver hair pulled back into a small, neat ponytail.

_ "What?" _ Connor gaped. He knew words had been coming out of Captain Stern's mouth, but he wasn't hearing a single one.  _ Hell, _ for all he knew he may have just cut her off. He was too far inside his own head to be paying attention. The word had just fallen out of his mouth completely unbidden.

"I know you heard me. This is your new partner, HK800. It is a specialized investigative model assigned to you. It’s going to help you with all these new android cases," Amanda’s tone was the same semi-excited one she’d used almost three years ago in a very similar situation.

"But I haven't been  _ having trouble  _ with the  _ android cases?" _ Connor responded dumbly.

Connor had literally started investigating his first case on the deviant androids  _ yesterday morning. _ Sure, it was an interesting case. An android who had reportedly attacked her owner and kidnapped his child.

Connor had lost their trail at the Eastern Motel in the Ravendale district. Though he may or may not have let them get away on purpose, but  _ hey, _ no one needed to know that.

All Connor knew about her was that she was an AX400 model that went by the name Kara. He also learned from the hotel room that she had cut off her hair and removed her LED. The case wasn't as pressing as it could have been. The child apparently was also an android, but the man who reported it didn't seem to have been too keen on telling Connor that. And Connor knew almost instantly from his interview with the man that he was an abusive piece of shit and a Red Ice user. No wonder the pair of androids had fled, and he couldn’t find it in himself to blame them.

"The cases look like they are going to change in severity and Cyberlife doesn’t want us unprepared for anything that could happen,  _ and _ it is standard procedure for cases like these," Her tone left no room for argument.

Connor, being the mature 32-year-old, he decided to flop down into the office chair and pout, "Amanda,  _ please. _ You know I don’t want  _ or _ need another partner,” he gestured vaguely in the direction of the HK800.

"Connor, It’s an android. You don’t even have to call him your partner if it makes you feel better,” Amanda let her tired, mom-like voice seep in, “You are the most qualified officer for these cases and you know that everyone else is overloaded. Take the case and the android. Now, don't argue with me anymore."

_ “Amanda,” _ Connor basically whined in a last-ditch effort to get her to change her mind.

_ “Connor! _ I said enough,” Amanda bit out as she stood up and viciously swiped her hand through the air.

Connor’s body gave a suppressed flinch and he then hung his head and nodded reluctantly. This was not going to end well for him. Sure, the HK800 was an android and Amanda had heavily implied that if he  _ died _ it wouldn’t matter. But it  _ did  _ matter to him.  _ It absolutely mattered. _

“Fine, I see,” Connor said his tone flat, “Thank you, Captain Stern,”

Connor then dragged himself out of the chair he was occupying and looked up at the android in question. He then got his first good look at him and felt dread crawl up his spine. This android was a textbook silver fox.  _ Fuck.  _ Did they design this android from his porn history? He shuddered, the possibility of that being the case was far too high for his liking. 

Connor let out an aggravated breath through his teeth. The android just had to be at least three inches taller than him.  _ Shit, he may even be taller than Nines. _ This was not going to be good for his already frayed mental state. Because not only was he being forced to have a partner, the HK800 had to look like _ that. _

Connor steeled his nerves and gave the android a smile, "Well, hello. I'm Detective Connor Anderson."

The android acknowledged him with a small nod, "I'm HK800, the android sent by Cyberlife. You may call me Hank."

"Well,  _ Hank. _ It looks like you're accompanying me to a crime scene," Connor let his fake smile fall from his face as he nodded his departure to Amanda. He had been on his way to a homicide that had assumed android involvement when Amanda called him into her office. Now, he was going there with a plastic bear of all things. What the fuck was his life?

Hank followed a couple of steps behind him and it was reminiscent of a puppy.

Connor tried to ignore him as he gathered up his things he’d need to head to the scene. He grabbed his large trench coat and gracefully threw it over his shoulder. He then flashed Hank a trained sexy smile, “You coming?”

Hank seemed to take the display as a cue to fix his tie, “Of course, Detective Anderson. I’m ready when you are.”

Connor shrugged and started to trot toward the front door. He couldn’t help but think the android looked stuffy in his Cyberlife uniform. He just felt he would look much better in some loudly patterned clothes, but he quickly shoved that unbidden thought back into the recesses of his mind.

The November Detroit weather was cold, Connor noted as he walked out of the police department. It was threatening to snow if he knew any better. The clouds were fat with the promise of nasty winter weather.

Connor sighed as he pulled out his cigarettes. He put one tightly between his lips and stuffed the rest back into his oversized coat pocket. He really needed a smoke if he was going to survive this.

"Detective Anderson?" Hank spoke up, the android’s voice was low and rough.

Connor felt overwhelmed by that voice for a moment,  _ "Hmm?"  _ he mumbled around the cigarette in his mouth. He kept walking as he patted himself down looking for his runaway lighter. Why were those motherfuckers so hard to find?

"What do you know about the deviant cases as of now?" Hank rattled off from somewhere behind him. Clearly, he was all business, but all androids were. Well, at least at the beginning.

Connor finally found his lighter and let out a triumphant noise. He clicked the flint a small handful of times before a small yellow flame appeared. He was finally able to pull a drag of smoke into his lungs. Only then was he even willing to consider talking about the deviant cases he was being forced to deal with.

"Not much,” Connor shrugged and took another drag off his cigarette, “All we know so far is that several androids over the last couple of months have been running away after apparently flipping the hell out. And just before you showed up, we learned of our first homicide with a possible android suspect. But what about  _ you? _ What do _ you _ know about them?" He flipped his ashes away as he pulled another drag. He really hated this fucking case. He knew way more about deviants than he'd ever let on. But nothing really seemed too terribly fucked up about the idea of deviancy. So, why was everyone making such a big fucking deal about it? He knew why, but it was still ridiculous.

"I can inform you that deviants are dangerous and unpredictable. We need to be prepared and remain vigilant through the duration of our investigation. We also need to close it as soon as possible." Hank informed.

Connor decided he really liked how Hank's voice sounded. But he decidedly hated what the android was saying.

Connor groaned when they finally arrived at his car and he unlocked it and clambered inside. He pulled out yet another cigarette as Hank climbed into the other side. He noted that Hank gave a small downward quirk of his lips as he noticed the new cigarette.

Connor smiled around the tobacco and slammed the car into gear. Then they were on their way.

Hank didn't seem to like Connor's driving too much because within moments his right hand was gripping the  _ ‘Oh shit’ _ handle.

Connor smiled despite himself, he’d made the android nervous. They finished out the ride in silence.


	2. I know what Thirium is

Connor pulled up to the crime scene. It was busy with reporters and civilians. He sighed, he knew he should have seen this coming. It had probably gotten around that there may have been an android involved.  _ Shit. _ He really hated reporters.

“I’m taking a wild guess I won’t be able to convince you to stay in the car?” Connor asked with a tight smile while squeezing the steering wheel with a knuckle-whitening grip. He may have been saving face for Amanda, but he still wasn’t all that willing to have another partner.

Hank shook his head, “Afraid not. My mission includes escorting you to crime scenes and all further investigation of leads.”

Connor rolled his neck and fell back and let out a groan, “Fine. Please do me a favour and don’t touch anything,” He put his hand on the door handle and a thought struck him,  _ “Oh, _ and don’t talk too much,  _ okay?” _

Hank looked vaguely annoyed, “Whatever you say, Detective.”

“Fucking hell,” Connor hissed out as he climbed out of the car. He immediately began to assess the surrounding environment. Quite a bit of the neighbourhood had gathered just outside of the police tape.  _ Double fuck _ . He steeled his nerves again and began his walk to the taped off house.

“Joss Douglas, for Channel 16. Can you confirm this is a homicide?” The polite reporter asked Connor while shoving a mic in his face.

Connor flashed his million-dollar smile, “I have nothing to confirm.” Then he was quickly walking past the tape and tried his best to ignore the jeering.

“Androids are not permitted beyond this point,” The android Connor had walked past said.

Connor rolled his eyes, he hated dealing with things like this. “He’s with me,” he called out over his shoulder. Then Hank was behind him again. But Connor didn’t turn around to acknowledge him. He was focused on the older man standing on the porch poking at a tablet.

Ben looked up and noticed the younger detective, “Evening, Connor. I was starting to get a tad worried.”

Connor rolled his eyes and threw a thumb in Hank’s direction,  _ “That _ is the reason I’m late.”

Ben looked thoughtful and shrugged disbelievingly, “So, you’ve got yourself an android?”

Connor shrugged back, “Amanda,” was all he said knowing it would be plenty of explanation.

_ “Ah, _ I see,” Ben said and gestured for the younger detective to follow as he began his briefing.

Carlos Ortiz was in atrocious condition, even worse than the decrepit and frankly disgusting house. His body was rotting around a multitude of stab wounds. It was amazingly quite gross. It looked like everyone else at the scene was at least some degree of nauseous. But not Connor, his stomach couldn’t find the energy to bother with such trivial behaviour. And even if he  _ was  _ nauseous, he was pretty sure there was nothing in his stomach to lose. He had a crime scene to focus on.

Connor had already started piecing the evidence together by the time Ben decided the smell was too much and wandered outside. 

Connor observed the crime scene, but he was also curiously watching Hank as the android started to walk around.

Hank was very intently taking in the whole crime scene. Walking from room to room with a flat but determined expression. Pausing and just looking at things, it was kind of mesmerizing.

Connor wondered briefly about what could be running through the android’s CPU as he checked out the kitchen. Clear signs of a struggle, if the bat and several overturned chairs were anything to go by. He felt his upper lip twitch. It looked like Mr Ortiz was probably physically abusing the android. He couldn’t find it in himself to be surprised.

Connor tried to keep his expression neutral as he turned back to the living room. Just in time to see Hank leaning over the knife. Then out of nowhere, Hank stuck his fingers into the dried blood and then fucking stuck them into his  _ goddamned mouth _ .

_ "What the ever-loving  _ **_fuck,_ ** _ Hank?" _ Connor squealed. Drawing the attention of the other officers.

Hank stood up and apologized half-heartedly, "I can take forensic samples in real-time. I'm sorry I should have given you some warning."

Connor groaned, "Using your  _ mouth?” _ He shook his head. Sure, his mouth was always curious as to what things tasted and felt like even if it was disgusting and could make him sick. But like what fucking weirdo at Cyberlife decided the mouth was a good place for a forensic lab. He had to hide a scoff, that seemed just like that bitch Kamski’s taste.

“Yeah, my artificial saliva is good for cleaning and testing the samples in a sterile environment,” Hank explained.

“That is oddly… convenient,” Connor stated, keeping his voice in check. He was honestly a little jealous that the android could stick random shit in his mouth and not get sick, “Okay, well. At least learn something _." _ he decided he really needed to ignore that damned android and focus on something besides him.

Connor decided to go check out the bloody writing above Carlos’ body. The writing was a near-perfect Cyberlife Sans. Android, it had to be. But he didn’t want to say anything out loud, anyone with eyes could have deduced  _ that _ fact.

"Detective Anderson?" Hank said in his  _ damn fucking _ voice.

Connor stood up and turned to face the android acting like everything was perfectly fine. "Hmm?" He raised an expectant eyebrow.

"I think I know what happened here," Hank reported casually.

Connor raised an eyebrow. This should be interesting, "Okay. shoot. I'm all ears" His curiosity was peaked. He was already pretty sure he knew what had gone on, but let’s see what this overpriced robo-bear had managed to come up with.

Hank led them into the kitchen, "The victim attacked the android with the bat. The conflict continued until the android grabbed the knife from that magnet strip and then the android stabbed the victim the first handful of times."

"Self defence, huh? Okay, okay. What's next?" Connor believed him, it lined up with his own findings.

"The victim fled to the living room. Tripped and fell to where he is now, and the android stabbed the remainder of the times for a grand total of 28 stab wounds."

"A crime of passion from an android,  _ strange," _ Connor muttered to mostly himself.

Hank meandered towards the back porch and Connor followed.

Hank looked around and then frowned heavily, "The android is still here," Hank said as he turned to look at Connor.

"What?" Connor internally flinched, "How would you know that?"

"There are no traces of movement except Officer Collin's size ten shoes and before you say anything about the time that has passed since the murder. This kind of soil would have held footprints for a long time even considering the Detroit weather," Hank drew out, his tone bordering on sarcastic.

Connor frowned, he wasn't expecting that. He let out a long-suffering sigh, "Well, okay then. We need to find the android sometime, huh?" His heart wasn't in this. He knew that if they found the deviant, he was going to be swiftly deactivated and sent back to Cyberlife and helping them get closer to removing deviancy all together. Which was something he absolutely  _ did not  _ want to happen.

Connor turned around and chose to go look through the bathroom. The only room he hadn't visited yet. When he opened the door, he wasn’t surprised to find the markings all over the wall and a small statue in the centre of the shower basin.

"RA9. The fabled Robo-Jesus," Connor snickered. He turned around to leave and the first thing he saw was Hank climbing on a chair. He gaped, "Hi.  _ What the fuck?" _

"I'm going to check something," Hank muttered as he disappeared into the attic. "There are traces of Thirium, or blue blood, the liquid that powers andr-."

"I know what the goddamned fuck Thirium is, you big bitch," Connor snarled cutting off the flat explanation, "I did not work in narcotics and on the Red Ice Task Force for  _ years _ to get lectured on what the fuck Thirium is!"

Hank's LED spun yellow for a moment or two before going back to calm down. "Apologizes, sorry for my unfair assumption. I'm going to return to following the Thirium trail now."

Connor grumbled as he watched Hank hoist himself up. Well, the deviant android is toast. _ He _ thought with a shake of his head.

It wasn't another five minutes when Hank yelled his discovery throughout the house. They had the deviant all covered in blood, thirium, and injuries.

Hell, this is beyond fucked up. Connor caught himself wishing the android had just run away as Hank shoved him into the back of the cop car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hank would have known what thirium is in-game. You can't change my mind.


	3. Interrogations and Too Much

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please be aware of the tags.

Connor was staring into the face of an abuse victim. The cigarette burns and broken white chassis exposed where the artificial skin could no longer reform. Those spoke volumes to him. He rubbed his eyes and sighed, he didn't even know why he was trying to get a confession out of this android. No matter what happened he was going to be deactivated. Killed in cold blood for defending himself, simply because no one considered him a person worthy of protection under the law.

Connor knew that if it was a human in front of him, he would be getting his injuries looked after, a change of clothes and maybe a shower. If the man in front of him was a human, he would be treated with at least some decency.  _ Hell, _ he would probably get a decent sentence through a justified homicide ruling. Well, maybe not, considering the number of stab wounds, probably second-degree murder, but it was the  _ idea  _ of it.

"Not gonna say anything?" Connor bit out, feeling sicker than any crime scene could ever make him feel, "Come on, I  _ know _ you fucking killed him. I know that you stabbed that man over and over again."

The android remained stoic and Connor stood up. He didn't have time, energy, or motivation for this shit. It was almost two am and he was itching for a smoke. He groaned and walked out of the interrogation room. He slammed the door behind him, causing the sound to echo around the space.

"I'm not getting anything out of that android," Connor groaned again and popped his neck.

"We could rough it up some?" Tina Chen said in a haughty tone, "Hey, it's not human." 

Connor had to suppress an eye roll but didn’t hide his glare. Sure, Connor knew it was just an act, just like his own callous behaviour. But he hated those words coming out of her mouth, nonetheless. How many people were tangled up in this never-ending web of lies?

"Androids don't feel pain, roughing it up as you so eloquently put it, would only damage it not make it talk," Hank said in a tired tone, e not usual of an android.

"What do you suggest then?" Connor barked as he was already heading towards the door. He was going to go smoke no matter what. He frankly didn’t give a shit about the fucked up interrogation of a broken man.

"Let me give it a shot, we don't have anything else to lose," Hank was trying to sound disinterested, but his body language said he really wanted a go at the deviant.

"Why not? We really don't have anything to lose," Connor waved it off, "I'm going to go take a smoke break. Don't destroy anything while I'm gone."

Hank got up and walked towards the interrogation room. A smile that made Connor’s stomach drop in a  _ very _ bad way crossed the android’s soft features.

Connor walked out of the exit letting the door bang shut behind him. He did not want to see that interrogation.

He dug around in his pockets and he wasn't even out the door before he had an unlit cigarette between his teeth. It made him feel better, settled his frayed nerves. Not to mention it lets everyone in the bullpen know where he was going and to not fucking bother him.

"Anderson?" Amanda’s voice came from somewhere behind him.

_ "Fuck,"  _ Connor said under his breath. He lightly chewed the cigarette before he turned around and took it out of his mouth. Shooting her a bright smile, "Yes, Captain Stern?"

"Aren't you supposed to be interrogating the deviant android?" Amanda said in that passive-aggressive tone she used when she wasn't happy but wasn't quite pissed yet. Conrad always referred to it as her ‘mom voice’ and Connor had taken to using the terminology.

"Yeah, but I already took my turn. I was in there for around an hour. The HK800 is trying it out now and I really need a cigarette," Connor rubbed at his temple, a pounding headache was starting to set in. God, he really needs to sleep. When was the last time he had even seen his bed? Connor was pretty sure it had been more than 48 hours.

"The HK800 is interrogating the deviant android? How interesting," Amanda mused and looked toward the interrogation room, "Go enjoy your cancer stick, Connor."

Connor frowned in her direction as she headed away, "I will, Amanda." He called out after her feeling the need to get the last word and he stuck the offending object back into his mouth for emphasis. Then he was out the door.

He turned the corner to where his car was parked. He found his lighter and lit his first smoke as he was walking. He felt his whole body relax as he pulled the smoke into his lungs. He held it there until it burned and then he let it out into the Detroit air. A couple drags and around a minute later he was climbing into his car. He cranked the engine and turned on the heater and some music. He reflected on what the day had brought him. A new partner, a continued moral crisis, and a dead abuser. Ah, another normal day in the life of Connor B. Anderson.

Around ten minutes and three cigarettes later he was finally ready to face the precinct again, "Back into the fray," He joked to himself as he killed the engine on his car.

Connor enjoyed the brief walk through the late-night, almost early morning calm. But when he walked back through the bullpen and then opened the door to the interrogation room. He was not expecting the chaotic scene that was in front of him. Everyone was inside the interrogation room trying to stop the android in his attempts to kill himself by smashing his face into the table. Also known as all hell was breaking loose.

**_"What the fuck!?"_ ** Connor screamed as he ran into the room and helped Chris in his attempts at stopping the android’s smashing. It was futile, thirium was splattered everywhere and the android went limp.

Everyone stood shell-shocked silence for several agonizing seconds. Connor lightly shook his hands to get some of the blue blood off.

_ "That went well!" _ Tina snarled as she made her way back to the bullpen.

Connor couldn't help but let out a distressed cackle. He dropped the arm of the android he was holding and took a few steps back. All he wanted at that moment was to wash off the thirium that was covering him. Then after the shock faded as quickly as it came and it turned into unbidden anger. _"Ya know, for once I agree with Tina!”_ he snarled, causing all the humans in the room to flinch. Connor rarely if ever used that tone, _“This is the last time I tell_ ** _you fuckers_** _not to break something!"_ He felt tears pick at his eyes as he pushed past Hank and went right back outside to smoke again.

Fuck this place he was going home! Connor fumed as he went to his terminal to clock out. He quickly noticed that Hank was following him. Connor actively ignored him. They didn’t exchange a word until they were outside.

It had finally started to snow, Connor noted as the snowflakes stuck to his mess of unruly curly hair.

"Detective?" Hank asked his voice soft, his breath didn’t fog up the air as a human would.

Connor  _ hated _ this fucking android. He was only here to bring upon the destruction of  _ years  _ of work he had been doing. The worse part? He only had this case because he was the only detective who wasn’t a complete dick to the androids.

_ Yeah, Connor, you seem civil with the tin cans. Here you can have the case that will have you killing them. _

Connor had planned on fucking around on the case until he could say he wasn’t finding anything. Or he was going to until Cyberlife decided they wanted him to work with a fucking robo-bear that looked like Connor’s goddamned dream lay.

But Connor didn’t say a single word of that, instead, he said, _"What?"_ He lit a cigarette and shoved it into his mouth and inhaled until he couldn’t anymore. Then instead of cold weather fog, he blew out grey smoke.

"Smoking is bad for your health, and you seem to do it quite a lot," Hank said as he inclined his head slightly to the side. Like Connor was a difficult puzzle.

_ Wasn’t that the fucking truth.  _ He rolled his burning eyes.

"Yeah, I am fully aware of the damage I am doing to my lungs," Connor took another drag for emphasis. He didn’t have the patience for this lecture from an android who didn’t even need to breathe. “So, leave me _the_ _fuck_ alone about it or you’ll have matching marks to that other android,” he snarled, knowing full well the threat was empty, and it only succeeds in making him feel worse. He sighed heavily and took another drag, "Speaking of that poor bastard. What happened in that room?”

Hank answered quickly and efficiently in his stupid, bass voice, "The deviant android confessed to the crime of murder and because of the high stress of the interrogation it self-destructed. But we have enough evidence to go off of for now. I will have a completed report available soon. You should take a look at it, and..."

Connor caught himself not listening, but more focusing on the wonderful, rumbly bass of Hank’s voice. It was far better than the atrocious words he was saying.

"Detective? Detective Anderson?" Hank said as he snapped his fingers in front of the smaller man’s face.

Connor was busted out of his inner thoughts and he had to hide his now flushed face. The colour on his cheeks from both embarrassment and anger. He groaned it had officially been too long since he had last slept and he hardly, if ever, admitted that.

"Yeah,  _ yeah. _ I'll read the report. It's time for me to go home.” Connor sneered and gave a dismissive wave and turned around, not even sparing another glance in Hank’s direction. He stuffed another cigarette in his mouth and retreated to his car. He finally caved and spared a brief look towards Hank and the android looked quite perplexed.

Connor turned around and didn't look back again. _ Fuck this, fuck him, fuck Amanda, and fuck Cyberlife! _

He remembered finding his car and climbing in but after that, he didn’t remember a thing until he was at his small home. He barely registered falling out of his car and scrambling back onto his feet. He fumbled with the keys until he successfully unlocked his front door and walked in.

"Sumo! Capri!  _ I'm home!" _ Connor called as he closed the door behind him.

There was quite the racket as the Saint Bernard clambered to greet his owner. Capri moved much more slowly and reserved as she too was coming to meet Connor. Several big kisses were Connor's award for arriving home safely _. _

_ "Ah, _ who's my good boy? And my pretty lady. I'm sorry I took so long, but you guys are used to that, huh? Let's get you guys some more supper." Connor petted his big fluffy lifelines as he stood up and they wandered towards the kitchen. Sumo and Capri’s large automatic feeders were refilled, and Sumo wiggled as he started to eat. Capri was more interested in what Connor was doing.

Connor smiled down at his dogs as he wondered if he should eat something himself. _Maybe?_ Yeah, a solid maybe. He groaned, he hadn't eaten anything since, _uh?_ He couldn’t even remember. He didn't really want to eat, but he reluctantly went to the fridge and pulled out a snack cake and shoved it into his mouth. He chewed quickly and swallowed dryly, he should have grabbed a drink to go with that. 

“Speaking of drinks,” He sighed as he moved to grab a glass but he was quickly overwhelmed with nausea and he had to grip the counter in his effort not to lose the snack he just ate.

Capri was softly whining from somewhere behind him, but Connor couldn’t respond that second.

He swallowed past the urge to vomit and sunk to the floor and was promptly covered by 65 pounds of dog. Connor grabbed fistfuls of Capri’s wiry fur and buried his face into her side and lost it. 

Loud, wet sobs wracked his body as he released all the fucked-up feelings and happenings of the last 24 hours. Sumo was at his side now, flopping down next to Connor and Capri.

Connor cried and cried releasing all those feelings onto his dog’s coat while sitting in the middle of his kitchen. He felt like a failure and like his life was spiralling even more off-track than he ever thought possible.

He didn’t know how long he sat there sobbing, but when he had finally run out of tears he pulled himself off the floor and away from Capri. “Thanks, Capri,” he mumbled as he gave the German Shepard some reassuring head scratches. Then he gave some love to the giant Saint Bernard, “Thanks to you too, Sumo.”

Connor then turned around and dug around in the kitchen until he found his bottle of Chardonnay and took it with him to his bedroom. He flopped down on his bed, got comfortable and popped the cork off the bottle and slammed back as much as he could stomach. Then when he paused to take a breath he recorked the cursed bottle and put it down on his nightstand.

He had to fight back nausea once again, but it wasn’t anything he wasn’t used to.

Connor stared at this nightstand and had a brief debate with himself before he opened the drawer and pulled out a bottle. Valium. He knew he really shouldn’t take it on top of drinking, but he was due for another round of Russian Roulette. With that resolve, he grabbed a pill and the bottle of wine and washed down the drugs. He once again recorked the bottle and flopped onto the bed. Maybe he could get some sleep now.

“Lights off,” Connor mumbled to the room and his lamp clicked off, “Time to pass the fuck out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was this chapter my way of just not dealing with the actual interrogation scene because I hated it? Yes, it was.
> 
> Connor's got two dogs!!!


	4. Too Much Coffee

Connor woke up that morning in a puddle of drool and the sound of the world ending. He pulled himself up into a sitting position. He was disoriented as fuck and was probably still under the influence of his vision fading in and out was any indication. 

What the fuck is that god-awful noise?

It wasn't the world ending it, but his alarm. He scrambled to find his screaming phone. When he did, he unlocked it quickly silencing the racket. He narrowed his eyes at the screen. 

**8 am** , it declared.

Connor wracked his brain, that gave him what three  _ maybe _ four hours of sleep? He nodded proudly. That was a damn good night’s sleep.

He heard some whining and looked at the end of the bed and saw Sumo lazily wagging his tail. Capri didn’t whine, but she was looking at him, face resting on her paws.

Connor smiled at his beloved dogs, "Looks like I'm still here, kiddos." He then dragged himself out of his bed and went to get cleaned up.

A hot shower cleared away all the grime from yesterday. But also made him remember why he hated that thirium faded away. He had no idea if he washed it all off or not. So, as a result, he scrubbed his skin raw. Washing away the invisible blood until his skin was red and sensitive.

When he finally pulled himself out of the shower and looked at himself in the mirror and read over the collection of "motivational" sticky notes. The only ones that were actually helpful were the little doodles he’d made of his family. He frowned and turned his attention to a small collection of sticky notes covered with tick marks. Each one of those tick marks was a person that Connor had killed or not been able to save. He grabbed the pen in his toothbrush holder and added one. A tiny tick mark for the android yesterday. 

He released a sharp breath between his teeth and gripped the edge of the sink until his knuckles turned white. He released another breath then another until he was grounded enough to leave the bathroom and start to get ready for the day.

First things first, he found his phone again. He needed to send his daily  _ ‘hey, I’m still alive message’  _ to Nines. Which he did and today was a simple emoji day. Either way, Nines would know that Connor was still among the living.

Connor put his phone down as he picked out his tacky and twinkish outfit of the day. Only to throw his giant, khaki trench coat over it.

Finally, dressed and clean, Connor headed to the kitchen.

Firstly, he made sure to refill Sumo and Capri’s auto waterers. Then and only then, did he go to the coffee maker and poured himself a cup. He loved his automated coffee maker. It was programmed to have it ready by the time he was mostly ready for work.

Connor tested the hot liquid and after deeming it ready he knocked the whole cup back. He let out a contented sigh as the warmth and caffeine settled in his tummy. Then he made another cup and placed it down on the counter. He walked to his bathroom and grabbed a couple of his multivitamins. He then walked back to the kitchen and knocked the pills back with the second cup of coffee. He felt alive as the false energy filled him slowly.

"Now, I’m alive enough to go to work.  _ Huh, _ puppers?" Connor muttered as he filled his large to-go cup. He patted his dogs’ heads as he headed out the door.

The second he was out the door he had a cigarette in his teeth. He may be a complete and utter train wreck, but he didn't smoke inside his home. Nicotine lingered, and the yellow stains were nasty to look at. He locked the door behind him and wandered over to his car. He got in and began the drive to the precinct and smoked another two cigarettes before he arrived. His car didn’t get the same respect as his home.

Connor pulled into his parking spot and gripped the steering wheel steeling his nerves for whatever crazy shit was waiting just inside those glass doors. He climbed out of the car and took several deep breaths and walked his way over to the prescient.

He was barely through those glass doors when things went sideways. He honestly wasn’t even surprised.

"Hello, Detective Anderson. You have someone waiting for you at your desk," The desk worker android, an ST300, greeted.

Fuck, who the hell could be here this early in the morning?

"Thank you," Connor mumbled as he tried to hide inside of his jacket as he walked towards his desk. 

Lo and behold it was Hank who was waiting for him. Connor tried not to frown, he was not in the mood for this. He was now officially jittery from all the caffeine and he really wished all the deviant business could be someone else's problem.

"Good morning, Detective Anderson. I'm glad you have arrived," Hank greeted with a nod.

"Good morning," Connor waved as he threw himself down into his chair, "And please call me Connor, I'm not old enough for all that title bullshit."

"Okay,  _ Connor," _ Hank said slowly as if he was testing the name out, seeing how it felt in his mouth.

Connor instantly felt warmer and sincerely regretted his choice. Yes, Connor. Brilliant! Give the robo-bear permission to call you by your first name. That is going to end fantastically well for your mental health. He thought to himself bitterly as he took a long drink of his coffee.

"What can I do for you this lovely morning, robo-bear?" Connor asked casually as he began to log onto his terminal.

Hank raised an eyebrow, "...Robo-Bear?" his lips were twitching.

_ Oh, fuck, _ Connor actually said that out loud. He really wanted the earth to swallow him whole.

"Yeah, I guess I need to give you some sort of nickname. Habit, I guess," Connor felt his voice rising in pitch.  _ Goddamn it. _

Hank either chose to ignore his obvious embarrassment or he didn't notice. He instead changed the subject, "Well, there is a report of strange activity in an abandoned building we should go check out, but it's not terribly pressing," Hank supplied.

Connor nodded, He needed to finish a few things before he went exploring broken buildings. Like, read that damn report from yesterday’s eventful interrogation. He should probably watch the tape too, but he absolutely was  _ not  _ going to do that.

"We can go investigate after lunch. I need to type up a few reports and take care of a small pile of other busy work before we can go exploring," Connor muttered as he decided he needed to go fill up his coffee cup again. He'd been conscious for maybe two hours and he was going after his fourth cup.

"Detective Connor?" Hank asked as Connor stood up.  _ Fuck that voice. _ "Is there a desk I could use?"

"Yeah, no one is using that one," Connor smiled as he pointed to the desk adjacent to his. Then he went to fill his cup.

When Connor returned from the break room, Hank was sitting in his new desk looking intently at the terminal. Connor sat down and was happy to note his own terminal was ready to use. He started on the aforementioned reports he needed to work on. There was only a brief silence before Hank spoke up again.

"Detective?"

Connor had to suppress a sigh. "Yes, Hank?"

"You have a dog, right? Two if my estimations are correct,” a beat, “I am fond of dogs.”

Connor didn't know how to respond at first. "How do you know that?" He settled on.

"There is dog hair on your chair," Hank smiled, "What're their names?"

"Their names are Sumo, he’s my Saint Benard, and Capri, she’s my German Shepard. If you must know," Connor answered awkwardly. He scanned over his desk, now knowing that Hank probably did the same. 

There were a couple of dirty coffee cups, his doodle book, his tablet and headphones. He had a few photos scattered around namely; a photo of Nines and himself, a photo of Conrad at his college graduation, and Connor’s academy graduation photo. He also had his collection of anti-government and gay pride stickers. Well, the worst that Hank could have learned was that he had brothers and that he was very gay.

"So, you like 80s music?" Hank asked out of the blue again.

"Yeah, who doesn’t?" Connor replied automatically.

"I would like to have the chance to listen to music," Hank seemed to muse to himself more than Connor.

"Well on our car ride to the building I'll play you some of my favourites,” Connor promised.

Hank seemed pleased with that and gave his terminal a small private smile. Then he returned back to his work.

Connor wasn’t sure of what to think of the expression that Hank was wearing, but it looked good on him. He returned back to his work.


	5. Illegal Activity

Connor and Hank stayed and worked at their respective terminals for a while longer until Connor had completed his reports.

"Hey, Hank?" Connor spoke into the silence. "I want to grab some lunch. After that, we'll head out to investigate that building. That cool with you?" 

Hank nodded and continued to look at his terminal, picking up on Connor’s silent message for him to stay in the bullpen.

Connor stood up to leave. He quickly had a cigarette between his lips as he crossed the threshold out of the building. He then began his short walk to Chicken Feed. He knew he wasn't going to eat anything, but a cold, sweet pop sounded heavenly.

Chicken Feed was a less popular food truck, barely scraping by with it’s ‘C’ health score. But Connor couldn’t care less. They were good people and it's not like he actually ate the food anyway. So, there only being two bodies at the truck wasn’t a surprise.

"Hey, Pedro. Hey, Gary," Connor greeted as he approached the food truck.

"Are you gonna eat today?" Gary inquired, not even looking up from the grill. They were friends at least at a professional level, Connor made sure that he was protected and Gary gave him free pop.

"Nah, but I will take a large pop, sweetest one you got," Connor replied with a smile. He lowered his voice a tad, "So, Pedro?"

"Yeah, man I got you," Pedro smiled as he pulled out a small baggie. Connor discreetly handed him the cash.

Gary put the pop on the counter.

"Thanks," Connor said to the both of them. They smiled back, they knew about all Connor's bullshit, but they didn't seem to mind. He was still a good cop and despite being slightly crooked.

Then when he turned around and let out a shrill scream as he walked straight into a looming Hank.

"Hello, Detective Connor," Hank stated plainly. Connor was clutching his chest and was lucky he didn't throw his soda in Hank's stupidly handsome face.

**_"Holy fuck!_** _You_ _son-of-a-bitch!"_ Connor wheezed, _"Don't fucking sneak up on me you fucking piece of plastic!"_

Hanks' mouth ticked downwards, "Sorry, detective. I was simply trying to keep up with you," The android’s voice seemed a little off.

"Yeah, do it louder next time,  _ fuck," _ Connor continued to wheeze as he walked away from the truck towards a standing room table. He pulled out a cigarette to calm his nerves. 

Hank frowned more noticeably at that.

"Smoking is bad for you," Hank informed… again.

"Yeah, I fucking know that you asshole!” Connor barked and took a drag, “Not to mention that's why I do it," he frowned up at his partner and watched his LED turn a slow yellow for a brief moment.

"Are you going to eat anything, detective?" Hank asked this time, changing the subject. Even though his LED stayed a confused yellow.

"Nah, these should be plenty," Connor gestured with the cigarette and the pop towards Hank.

The android, in turn, frowned very deeply, LED cycling between yellow and red, "Are you aware that you are almost critically underweight?" Hank said in a clipped tone.

So, it was critical now, was it? Connor shrugged. He hoped Amanda hadn't noticed, he doesn't want to put on another forced medical leave. He also wondered why Nines hadn’t said anything. Well, he doesn’t normally anymore, but if it got bad enough, he’d usually at least say something about it

"It's not critical or anything stupid like that. I just don't like eating," Connor answered as honestly as he could. He didn't like eating, because he didn't like being alive, but that was not a detail Hank needed. Even if he was  _ technically _ in remission, getting past the guilt and nausea that came with food was the worst.

"That's concerning along with what appears to be illegal drug consumption," Hank nodded his head towards the pocket that contained his little baggie of Valium.

"Shit, you've seen right through me," Connor chuckled, "They weren't kidding when they said you were a good investigator."

"I'm the best Cyberlife has to offer. Though I catch myself wondering why I've been partnered with you. Are you really the best the DPD has to offer?" Hank said, with an icy lack of bite.  **_Ouch._ **

"Nope, I'm a piece of shit. I have a high solve rate, but that’s only because and I normally clock about a hundred hours a week in the department, So, I'm bound to get something right," Connor was not in the mood to defend his short, semi-successful career to an android that could probably see through every single one of his carefully crafted walls. Though, Connor guessed that Hank already knew the truth. That he absolutely was the best detective in Detroit and maybe as far as Ann Arbor and other surrounding areas. He was amazing at it, but he wasn’t going to be good at this case.  _ Sorry, Hank. _

"Do you sleep, Detective?" Hank asked, changing the subject.

"Not really?" Connor said around the straw of his pop, "I sleep maybe ten, uh, twelve? hours a week."

Hank looked horrified, "You're going to kill yourself at this rate," he all but gasped.

Connor couldn't help but chuckle. This android has only known him for like a day and a half and yet here they were, "That's the plan," he mumbled as he stuck another cigarette in his mouth.

There were a few minutes of awkward tension as they had a staredown as Connor continued to smoke.

Hank leaned on the table and looked straight into Connor's eyes breaking the silence. "I see that working with you is going to be a challenge," he smirked, "But I very much enjoy challenges." Then the motherfucker  _ winked _ at him, his body language leaking sex appeal, probably intensionally. Yup, Cyberlife hacked his porn history for this.

Connor choked on the smoke on his lungs and started to cough,  _ "Well, okay then!" _ He stepped back quickly, "We have a building to investigate!" He scrambled away and tried to hide his burning face from the android.

The two of them walked in awkward silence to Connor’s car. The hopped in and kept his promise to Hank and played some of his favourite 80s hits. Which included ‘You Can Call Me Al,’ ‘Video Killed the Radio Star,’ ‘I’m Still Standing,’ and ‘Under Pressure.’ Among others that were randomly tossed out by his phone. Connor noted that Hank bobbed his head to the beat, occasionally his LED flashed to yellow. He was such a strange android, but far from the strangest one Connor had met over the years.


	6. Heights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need to make a more consistent posting schedule...

When the detective duo arrived, the building was next to a large group of urban farms. Hank was right in saying people were not supposed to be here. But Hank didn't go into much detail past that, that did seem to be a theme with the large android.

"So, Hank," Connor asked as he walked up the stairs, "What exactly was the report we got about his place?" He could hear Hank sigh behind him.

"Did you not read the memo I sent you?” Hank sighed, "Never mind." He pulled ahead of Connor, "There was a report of a suspicious man who was said to be hiding an LED under a beanie."

"Oh, that is definitely weird," Connor said as they arrived at the door in question.

Hank had easily taken the lead and Connor had been willing to give it to him. There was a sharp shift in the air as he got into a defensive position just outside the door.

_ "Detroit Police!  _ **_Open up!"_ ** Hank shouted with an authoritative bark before waiting around five seconds before smashing the door down.

If Connor didn't have years of experience and training under his belt, he would have shown his surprise. But it didn’t stop him from briefly thinking about all the power contained in Hank’s massive legs. That and busting the door down should have been option two, you know, after trying the door handle. 

The second Hank crossed the threshold there was an intense amount of chaos. He noted as he entered the room there were hundreds of pigeons  _ everywhere.  _ Easily hundreds of them.

"Holy shit," Connor said in amazement.

"Damned winged rats!" Hank cursed from where he was waving his arms around. Clearly pissed off by the unwanted surprise of the hundreds of pigeons, because his LED was currently flashing between yellow and red.

Connor let out a soft chuckle, good thing there wasn't anyone in here or they would have gotten a jump on Hank. But Connor wasn’t so certain there wasn’t anyone here and they weren’t getting the jump on him. He kept his service weapon poised as he walked into the room. 

"There are so many pigeons in here.  _ Why?" _ Connor walked around and quickly answered his own question as he found a nearly empty box of birdseed. “Oh my god, they wanted all these birds here,” He said in awe. Whoever was here was feeding the copious amount of birds that had gathered here. It was actually kind of sweet, all things considered.

Much to Hank's dismay as he stomped around the apartment investigating, “The occupant of the apartment is an android,” He concluded aloud, shaking his head, “There is no food in the fridge and no human could live with all these fucking pigeons. Well, I, as an android, wouldn’t want to do it either.” 

“I know right, but they seem friendly enough. I’m more curious as to why the deviant chose to take care of pigeons,” Connor mused aloud as they took in the markings on the wall. This android had been deviant for a while if the extent of the scrawls were anything to go by. Ra9 was written a lot among all the mazes. 

"The ID on the counter is fake," Hank said after a few moments. Even though he was still heavily scowling at the birds. "Not to mention the encryptions and the fact that RA9 is written 2471 times throughout the apartment." 

“Yeah 2471 is a lot,” Connor mused as he wandered towards the bathroom and quickly noticed a little light on the sink. "Yeah, and there is an LED in the sink," he called out.

"Fuck all these pigeons," Hank grumbled and he kept scanning the living room area. Who had thought to program a foul mouth into that android?  _ Going deviant already, Hank? _

“Hey, take a look at this,” Connor called as he walked up to the glowering android.

Hank basically ripped the LED out of Connor’s hand, “It’s from a WB200, Model Number 847 004 961. It was reported missing October 11,” Hank paused and squinted a bit, “of _ 2036. _ This android has been deviant for over two years, though the LED itself has only been deactivated very recently.”

Connor wasn’t surprised that much at the prospect of an older deviant, but he knew much more about deviants than Hank did as things stood. “Which means he’s probably still here somewhere.”

Hank nodded and turned around to walk into the bathroom.

Connor kept scanning the apartment and then something caught his eyes. Books, paper ones, "Wow, this is quite the collection," he mused. He walked over and picked one up and began to thumb through the yellowing pages. Old books had such a unique smell. 

He lost himself for a good few minutes reading a random page and then grabbing another book and repeated the process. Until he heard a loud crashing noise and a grunt.

Connor threw the book down and sprinted to the noise drawing his service weapon on the way. He quickly cleared the kitchen and in the living room up watched the suspect start fleeing and Hank was laying on the floor.

"What the fuck, Hank?  _ Chase him!" _ Connor screamed as he began his own pursuit.

Hank pulled himself up and was after the deviant in a flash. Hank quickly pulled in front of Connor and then the two androids were well ahead of him within seconds.

_Fuck!_ Connor thought bitterly as he holstered his gun and started running in full pursuit. Then he stopped cold as he watched them run across rooftops and from building to building. That was far too dangerous for Connor’s taste. He decided instead of trying to jump from building to building, which he absolutely was _not_ going to do, that he'd take a shortcut and meet them somewhere up ahead.

Connor accessed the area quickly and deduced that he could cut them off on the roof of a building a few blocks away. Which worked way too well because he got ahead of the chase. Connor's eyes widened as he noted the deviant was running straight towards him.

Connor quickly decided to try to intercept the deviant, but he quickly realized he was outmatched. Which he should have known already, but he was not the best at making good decisions. After they struggled for a minute the deviant was able to fully get the upper hand and roughly tossed Connor towards the edge of the roof.

**_"Fuck!"_ ** Connor screamed as his heel caught the edge of the roof and he was tumbling backward. He couldn’t regain his balance and then he felt that horrid weightlessness of free falling. He’d really hoped he wouldn’t die from a fall. That was literally the only way he didn’t want to die.  _ Oh god, _ he thought as he closed his eyes knowing he'd met his match.

But it never happened. Connor felt himself being roughly pulled back onto the roof. Part of that process gave him worse vertigo than the fall.

Then as soon as his feet touched the solid surface of the roof the sheer terror and panic slammed into him, causing his brain and lungs to stop working. His legs collapsed and he was gasping as he squeezed his eyes closed. Still feeling like he was falling.

_ "Detective!" _ Hank's voice sounded really far away, "Connor! You have to breathe!" Hank was instructing loudly as he was rubbing too firm circles into his back.

Connor attempted to follow the instructions. The process automatic.  _ In. Out. In. Out. _

Then the world slammed back into motion. He was tightly clutching Hank's Cyberlife jacket and hot tears were running down his face. But he was, as a matter of fact, safe. He then realized just had a fucking panic attack. A goddamned panic attack and while on the job. He tore his hands away from Hank and scrubbed them against his wet face. Then he collapsed back against Hank, needing the physical comfort like a lifeline.

_ Shit. _ Connor groaned, at least he wasn't dead. Maybe he’d try to count that as a plus. He continued to focus on his breathing until his heart settled and the tears finally stopped. 

"Looks like I'm still afraid of heights," Connor whispered into Hank's chest. The sound of his thirium pump was comforting, even if it didn't quite sound human.

"I'd say," Hank mumbled, and placed a hand on Connor’s forehead for some reason or another, "You have panic attacks, that is not anywhere in your file."

"Yeah, there’s a lot of things about me that aren’t in my file,” Connor snorted bitterly as pulled himself away from Hank and then into a standing position. He swayed on his feet briefly, “That being said it's not every day someone tries to throw me off a  _ fucking skyscraper." _

"Fair, but this building is only six floors, hardly a skyscraper." Hank looked towards the field to their left, "The deviant escaped."

Connor looked towards the expanse of a suburban farm, “You would have caught him if it wasn't for me." He said that fact simply. He was disappointed in the failure but pleased with the android's escape.

"Maybe, but I definitely could have been faster, and I don't think this investigation would have progressed well if you died," Hank mused.

Connor frowned, not the most pure-hearted reasoning for saving him, but he wasn't dead. So, he wasn’t going to be terribly picky. And it wasn't like Hank was a deviant, Connor was still just a string of numbers and probabilities.

"Thanks, Hank," Connor smiled softly up at the android, "Let's get out of here, we know what he looks like we'll find him later. I need a cigarette." He patted around in his pockets and found the pack, noting there were only two left. Connor frowned, he smoked a lot, but not  _ this  _ much. He hadn’t smoked a whole pack in half a day in a while. He usually had around maybe six or seven a day, not even a full pack.

"Smoking is a sure a way to kill yourself just as falling of this building and yet here we are," Hank chastised him.

Connor was still shaking, and he felt like he was still waiting to splat on the ground, "Smoking is a much more fun way to go." He mused and decided to wink at the android then stuck a cigarette in his mouth for emphasis.

Hank's LED flashed to yellow as he rolled his eyes and finally fell into step beside the retreating Connor. 


	7. Suspicions

Connor had asked Captain Stern to leave early right after they returned to the precinct. The detective looked like he wasn’t above begging, but much to his astonishment she seemed more than happy to let him go. He gathered up a few things, threw on his coat and was out the door. Barely sparing anyone a second glance.

As much as Hank’s programming was screaming at him to be annoyed with his partner for the unscheduled absence. He just couldn’t find it in himself to acknowledge it.

Connor hadn’t stopped shaking since Hank pulled him back onto the roof and that was almost an hour ago. There wasn’t much to do right now that he couldn’t do without Connor anyway. Not to mention Connor was already on overtime, there was no legal reason he had to stay and work anymore for the day.

Hank decided to sit at his new desk and fill out some reports. He would occasionally let his mind wander to the malnourished and self-destructive detective. 

What was his story? And what in the ever-loving fuck did the detective mean by ‘there’s a lot of things about me that aren’t in my file’? 

Hank had no idea, because the only thing of slight interest on the detective’s record was a petty theft charge from when he was 17. What was the detective hiding?

Hank randomly decided to make a report to Cyberlife. Joining Jeffery in his mind palace was something Hank oddly wasn’t looking forward to, but he had to do it. And since when did he care about that? Or anything for that matter. He was an android, he was literally made to do this.

The conversation was short and to the point. Jeffery seemed disappointed in him for choosing to save the detective over catching the deviant. But still Hank couldn't bring himself to regret it. The idea of continuing the investigation without Connor made his biocomponents protest weakly.

_ Software Instability _

The words flashed across his vision once again. Hank couldn't seem to figure out what the strange error was trying to tell him. How was his software unstable? 

Hank ran several diagnostics after he pulled himself from his mind palace. Every single one of the reports were coming back clean. So, he decided to continue ignoring them for now.

After a couple of hours, Hank had done all the possible police work that he could justify doing. After sitting still for a total of one minute and fifteen seconds, he finally decided to say fuck it and dig through Connor's desk.

Connor's desk was messy, but not disgusting. It was more of an unorganized and a little cluttered mess. The first thing to catch his eye was that the detective had a drawing pad for doodles. 

Hank picked it up and flipped through the drawings. He quickly felt like he was invading something very private. He put the book back down and decided to pretend he didn't see it. He then turned his attention to the photos on the desk. 

There was a photo of Connor and, according to Hank's database, Connor's younger brother, Richard. The two looked strikingly similar, he noted. His eyes traveled next to the photo tucked inside the frame. It was a smaller picture of Connor in a University of Michigan cap and gown. It was a nice photo, Connor looked much healthier. 

Then Hank frowned heavily as he cross-ran some information. Connor hadn’t gone to that college. He had gotten his degree online while he was still a beat cop. That didn’t add up. He stared at that photo for 45 seconds before he aggressively dismissed it and the contradictions. 

He finally turned his attention to the last photo. It was a standard police academy graduation photo. Connor looked very young and very happy. A wide smile stretched across his face, despite the serious looks on most of the other faces. Hank thought it was nice.

Hank turned away from the photos and looked through the stickers on Connor's divider. Several bright colors and passive aggressive phrases graced the stickers. Hank logged the detail that Connor was gay and very open about it. And he was an avid humanist and wasn’t fond of the government. Though there was a random FBI sticker among the collection and Hank thought it was odd. Not to mention the fact that Connor himself worked for the government.

Hank finally turned his attention to the glass wall beside the detective’s desk and noted quite a few stories and other odds and ends taped up there. 'Connor is a heavily accomplished Detective.' was quietly added to his folder on the man.

Among the accomplishments placed on the wall were a bust of a large-scale prostitution ring in 2027, several successful Red Ice raids from 2028 to 2031, and an article about when a much younger Connor had solved a ten-year-old cold case.

Hank was going to continue his snooping for a little while longer, but he received a report of a possible homicide at the Eden Club. There was suspected android involvement. He couldn't turn down investigating this, he quickly decided. He turned to leave the precinct, it was time to go get Connor.

The ride was around fifteen minutes to the small house Connor claimed as his own. The yard wasn't kept up all that well, and the porch light was turned off. 

Hank sighed as he hopped out of the autonomous taxi and headed for the front door.

"Detective Anderson?" He yelled as he knocked on the door. No answer. He rang the doorbell. No answer. He rang the doorbell an obnoxiously long amount of time. Still no answer.

Hank furrowed his eyebrows and decided it was time to see what the detective was doing. He turned on his heel and went to look through the windows. After peeking through the kitchen window Hank found Connor. He was passed out in the middle of the floor and didn't look like he was doing very well.

Hank's CPU stopped its regular functions as a mantra of 'Save Detective Connor Anderson' rattled repeatedly. His first thought was to break the window, but he didn’t think he’d fit through the frame. The next thing he knew, he had run to the front porch and picked the lock. When he opened the door, he was face to face with a ginormous dog. Sumo definitely weighed more than Connor.

"Hey, Sumo," Hank said cautiously, "I'm here to save your owner. See? I'm not here to hurt you." Sumo seemed satisfied with that answer as he meandered towards the kitchen to get a drink of water. Hank still needed to check on Connor. He took a few steps towards the clearly unconscious man.

_ "Connor?" _ Hank asked softly as he began scanning the scene before him. Connor was still alive if not barely. He needed to act fast.

Then he heard the growling. A small alert of then a threat level of 39% and rising popped up in his HUD. He slowly turned toward the source of the sound and a German Shepherd was under the table close to Connor and her teeth were bared in a very clear threat. 

Hank knew he needed to get her out of the way he was going to be able to do a full check up on the detective. "It's okay, Capri. I need to check on Connor, okay?" He made a slow move to touch him and noted his mistake the second she lunged towards him teeth nashing together.

He pulled back fast enough with ease. Several options to take care of the protective dog popped up. 

Capri had made a move to stand over Connor, her growling growing more vicious.

Hank looked around desperately then he saw a spilled bottle of Valium lay not far from Connor's hand. "Oh no." Then things got much more serious as Hank noticed a shattered wine glass and spilled wine. Those two substances were absolutely not supposed to be mixed. The seriousness of the situation was quickly climbing.

Connor was really trying to kill himself. He hadn’t been joking all those times. The detective was far more unstable than Hank had originally thought. He had to save him and there was a dog in the way.

Hank knew hurting the dog wasn't an option. Well, a viable option for maintaining a working relationship with Connor and the idea of hurting Capri made his whole body protest. He looked around and noticed a pair of dog crates in the corner of the living room. He just needed to get her in there, safely for both of them. 

He ran a few preconstruction before he settled on a safe way to pick her up and move her. That didn't involve him getting bit. 

Hank moved quickly and scooped Capri up into his arms tucking her mouth away. 

She growled and fussed and fought the whole time, but Hank did get her into the dog crate. Even if she continued to growl and scream. 

Hank didn't have time to worry about her any longer. Every second counted with the Detective's precarious situation.

Now, how should he go about waking Connor. His preconstruction software glitched a bit at the reading he was getting from the unconscious man. He leaned down and ran the first one he managed to select. He drew his arm back and smacked the detective in the face. There was no response. He did it again, his stress levels climbing a bit. Connor's eyes fluttered a bit but he still didn't rouse beyond that. Then with one more Connor finally responded with a groan. 

Then his eyes fluttered open, "What the fuck?" He inquired quietly. He hand sloppily going to his red cheek. He was at least aware of the pain.

"It's me, Hank. You're on the verge of an overdose. We need to get you taken care of," Hank said softly as he started to pick Connor up. Pulling the smaller man into a bridal carry.

Connor smacked his hand in Hank’s direction as a token protest, but he was too weak to do much else. His eyes rolled back at the motion of being moved, clearly uncomfortable.

Hank wasn't sure what to do. He needed to get the toxins out of Connor’s system, but Hank wasn’t sure how to do that safely with what Connor could have lying around. He doubted the detective had activated charcoal or narcan. 

Should he call an ambulance?

Connor made a very distressed noise and shiver as he paled further in colour.

Hank decided Connor may throw up soon on his own. They were almost to the bathroom when Connor did something to make Hank take pause.

Connor was attempting to snuggle with Hank, by wrapping his arms around the android’s midsection. He let out a weak hum when Hank in return squeezed him lightly.

Chasing comfort, are we? Hank liked the feeling.  _ Feeling? _

_ Software Instability _

Hank had to swipe away the several error messages and forced himself to continue the trek to the bathroom. Connor needed to be taken care of, first and foremost.

When they got to the bathroom Hank put Connor down against the bathtub. Where the detective grumbled to himself about something or another. Hank didn't take the time to try to understand what Connor was saying as he began his search of the bathroom for something useful.

_ "I'm going to be sick," _ Connor mumbled as he wiggled his way closer to the toilet.

Hank frowned as the smaller man emptied his stomach. Well, that takes care of flushing out his stomach. 

Hank scanned him and was relieved to find that the detective’s condition was beginning to stabilize. If only slightly.

"Can you sit up for me?" Hank asked softly as he sat down next to the detective.

Connor rolled his eyes as he complied, "So, you're my babysitter now, too?" He spit out weakly in an acidic tone Hank hadn't heard before.

"No, I was just coming to pick you up for an investigation," Hank grumbled as he reached for Connor's face.

Connor balked his whole body moving away from the android’s touch. His eyes looked a little wild as he watched the hand.

Hank decided to ignore the clear signals that Connor didn’t want to be touched. And felt his forehead anyway. Connor’s temperature was too low though his pupils weren't acting as they were supposed to. Hank decided may actually need to call an ambulance. He retracted his hand. 

Connor was glaring at him, but the effect was ruined by his drunkenly flushed cheeks and impossibly pale skin, "What investigation is so important that you had to come and get me?" He asked after a moment.

"A potential homicide at a club downtown, there is suspected android involvement," Connor's eyebrows perked up, "I would have gone by myself, but as an android I cannot go into places like that without you."

"That sounds fun," Connor mused as he ran a hand through his hair, "Give me five minutes and I'll be ready to go." Hank stared at the detective, He was clearly in no condition to go on an investigation.

"Detective Anderson," Hank cooed, "I’m not sure that you going is the best idea. I think we should call emergency services."

Connor shot daggers at Hank, until his eyes widened impossibly so and he scrambled towards Hank. He grabbed the android by his suit jacket and gripped it so hard his knuckles turned a chalky white and angry red. “No!  _ Please, please, please _ don’t call 911. They’ll take me to the ER!” Connor begged.

Hank felt surprise rush through his circuits,  _ “Yes? _ Because you need to go to the ER?”

_ “No! _ You don’t understand,” Connor emphasized his urgency by giving Hank a small shake, but he just ended up throwing himself around. “Nines’ll be there and they’ll tell him what I’ve done.  _ Oh god, _ I’d finally convinced him I stopped doing this.”

Hank stared down at the distraught detective, who the hell was Connor talking about, “Nines?”

Connor turned his eyes to the floor, “My brother. He, uh, works in the ER.”

“Oh,” Hank said simply.

“Yeah, he worries about me and he finally thinks I’m starting to get better,” Connor released his hands from Hank’s jacket letting them fall into his lap, “But I’m _ not _ . I’m getting  _ worse _ again.”

Hank wasn’t sure what to do with that, but he felt an odd pain in his thirium pump and several error messages clouded his vision, “Maybe we could go to a different ER?”

Connor looked up at him, “No, I’m starting to feel better,” He said resolutely as he pulled himself up from the floor. He only staggered a bit before he paled and turned around and fell to the floor and once again gagging towards the toilet. Though nothing came up, just harsh dry heaves and a few stray tears.

Hank waited until he finished, “Detective Connor? I really don’t think…”

Connor’s eyes flashed like lightening, _ "I can do as I damn well please!" _ He had venom lacing his words and an impressive volume for someone in his condition, "Now, if you'll stop fucking acting like a  _ goddamned babysitter _ and bring me some fresh clothes. I’m going to take a shower and then we'll be on our way.  _ Got it?" _

Hank raised his eyebrows, this man was insane, but there was no room to argue, “Fine.” His program simply added 'Get Connor Clothes' to his to do list.

“Good, that’s what I fucking thought,” Connor growled as he again attempted to stand up. This one was successful.

Hank nodded and turned to find Connor's room and get him an outfit. When he wandered to the small man’s closet, Hank noted that Connor had no sense of style. But it didn’t seem to bother him. But Hank had no idea what to grab, so he yelled out, "What do you want to wear?"

"I don't give a shit," Connor yelled back and after a brief pause, "Just make sure you bring me my coat."

Coat, okay. Hank picked out a random complete outfit and brought it to Connor.

Connor was currently setting up to get into the shower.

Hank had to swipe away error messages as he seen Connor in his current state of undress. Given he was only in his underwear. 

Hank couldn’t help but scan the detective. He noted several nasty scars, both new and old. His freckles and moles dotted his entire body randomly. They reminded Hank of the stars. Though what stuck out the most was how skinny the detective was. Hank's previous scans had indicated that the detective was underweight but there was something different about seeing it with his own eyes.

Connor spoke up and waved towards the sink, "Just put them there and shut the door behind you."

Hank quickly did as he was told. He didn’t know why he spent all that time ogling the detective. He frowned and made sure to enhance his auditory processers to make sure Connor didn't fall or do something else stupid. The man was still in very bad condition. Despite his stubborn attitude.

"Well, I guess it's time to be nosy," Hank muttered to himself as he began to explore the house.

Connor seemed to at least try to keep the house clean, but it appeared he wasn’t necessarily that good at it. Sumo and Capri, on the other hand, looked very well taken care of. 

The detective even had the foresight to provide the dogs with large autonomous feeders and waterers. Hank approved of that and went to go pet Sumo. 

Sumo just huffed and petting the dog made his biocomponents all fuzzy.

"Good boy," Hank whispered as he stood back up. Which he finally noted that Capri growled at him again. He couldn't blame her for her malcontent, she was clearly very protective of her owner.

Hank nodded in her direction and then turned towards the kitchen.

He scanned the spot he found Connor in again. Hank confirmed that the Valium was illegally obtained, though he already knew that. Hank then picked up the wine bottle on the table. It was a bottle of Port and it was a good half empty. Hank could tell it had only been opened recently. Hank recorked the bottle and placed it back on the table. Then he noticed there was a picture lying face down.

Hank was intrigued and picked it up and scanned it. It was a blonde haired, blue eyed man standing next to Connor. Both of them were smiling.

_ Daniel L. Phillips: Deceased. Born 6/07/2004 Died 10/11/2035. _

Hank frowned heavily. The scan had brought up a lot of information on the man. He was a previous employee at the DPD and ranked as a detective. He was killed in the line of duty in a hostage situation gone wrong. Lastly, he was Connor Anderson’s previous partner.

“Oh,” Hank muttered a few pieces falling into place. Hank placed the photo back into its original position and turned to leave the kitchen. Connors reluctance made clear by a previous death of a partner was a more reasonable motive than Hank had thought previously.

Hank walked to the living room and found an extensive collection of vinyl records. An odd thing for someone as young as Connor to have. He walked over to the cabinet with the records and a sleek, modern record player. He decided to pull out a record at random,  _ Wham! _ The record proclaimed, a classic band popular in the 70s and 80s. He slid it back into its original spot and after pulling out several more;  _ Billy Joel, Beyoncé, Queen, Linkin Park, David Bowie, Tally Hall, _ and so many more. Hank added 'Connor really loves older music' to his growing database on his partner.

Hank turned away from the records and noticed more photos. A lot of them, hanging on the walls, placed on tables, and on the TV stand.

Hank picked up the first one that caught his eye. Because it looked like it was being hidden in plain sight. The picture itself was old and worn and looked like it had been ripped up and put back together. Maybe even more than once.

_ Caroline Anderson - Deceased. Born 03/23/1976 Died 09/25/2022. _

Connor's mother, his system supplied him. She died when Connor was sixteen. Hank frowned at that but then put the photo back down as close to the original position as he could.

Hank picked up another photo, he didn't need to scan it to know that it was Connor's younger brother Richard. But Hank scanned it anyway.

_ Richard "Nines" N. Reed _ .

The name came up differently in his database this time. Hank frowned, the only reason he could come up with for such a change was marriage. Plus, Nines was a man? Hank shook his head, there were a few options for that. Considered there was another man in the photo and they were in an embrace, the answer was pretty obvious. It looked like neither of the Anderson boys were straight.

Hank then turned his attention to the other man in the photo. Maybe that was where all his answers lay. Richard's husband if his assumption was correct. But what his scan results told him almost made him drop the picture

_ Model GV200 #872 124 814 - 32 - Reported missing from Detroit Police - 5/27/2035. _

"What the _ fuck?" _ Hank muttered aloud. He scanned the photo again and the results came back the same. The way this looked was that Richard was married to a missing police android. 

Now that would answer some questions, but it raised far more. It also confirmed Hank’s suspicion that Connor knew more about deviants than he was letting on. Or Connor and his brother were none the wiser. But this android was completely pulling off the rouse of being a human, so it was clearly a deviant.

"Lucky son-of-a-bitch, isn't he?" Connor said from somewhere behind him.

Hank froze, he'd been so focused on the picture he hadn't even heard Connor leave the bathroom. So much for enhancing his auditory sensors.

Thankfully Hank's social protocols kicked in, "It seems so. Richard, um, Nines took his partner's last name?" Hank didn't want to outright call attention to the fact that the other was an android. 

"Yeah, Gavin was pretty insistent on it. He claimed there were too many Andersons. Which I don't blame him, because he's not wrong. Plus, Richard Reed has a nice ring to it," Connor mused as he took the photo out of Hank's hand.

Hank made a note; this deviant went by Gavin Reed and was so convincing in it's act as a human that he had actually managed to marry one. Strange.

Hank did a quick manual scan for the hell of it, completely not expecting something to actually pull up.

_ Gavin Reed. Born 10/07/2002. Criminal Record: None. Naturalized on 02/12/2036. _

Hank was floored, there in HUD was a picture of a man who clearly matched the man in the photo he was holding. The android was a United States citizen and everything. Hank couldn't believe it. The amount of intelligence and planning it must have taken to pull that off. A deviant android posing as a Russian immigrant and naturalizing. So they would have the necessary paperwork to function in society. All the while remaining undetected. 

Hank was going to have to pay Nines and Gavin Reed a visit.

Connor smiled at the photo and put it back down on the coffee table.

Hank added 'Connor cares deeply for his family' into his folder.

"When did they get married?" Hank asked because he needed as much information on this as he could get.

"Around two years ago, about a month after Gavin got awarded his citizenship. It was a cute little ceremony." Connor mused, but he looked uncomfortable with the topic, so he changed it, "You wanna start heading out towards that club?" Connor was a little worse for wear, the dark circles under his eyes were far more defined than normal. His eyes were bloodshot from the stress. He wasn't quite as pale as he had been, but that wasn't saying much.

"Are you sure you want to go?" Hank asked cautiously, but Connor still shot him a withering look.

_ "Yes,  _ Hank. But you're driving, so shut the fuck up about it," Connor bit out as he pushed past him to grab his car keys which he promptly threw at Hank.

"Okay, Detective Connor." And with that, they were out the door towards the Eden Club. This visit to Connor's house gave him more questions than answers and more than his fair share of errors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't like ever care for an OD patient like this. Please.


	8. Compassion for Lost Souls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags have been updated.

Connor was still a little bit under the influence as he clambered into the passenger side of his car, knowing full well he wasn't fit to drive. 

He couldn't remember how many pills he'd taken this time, but it was far more than he should have. But at least he remembered that he had almost two glasses of wine. Hank really had saved him. Though he didn't know how he felt about dragging himself out of the house to a crime scene right after he very nearly overdosed on his kitchen floor. Though he was certain this wasn't the first time.

He pondered on his existence during the whole car ride before Hank pulled up to the club.

Connor was horrified to see the bright neon sign and a screen declaring 'Sexiest androids in town.' Club and Sex club were very different things and he was significantly less okay with being in one of those.

He felt his stomach drop into his feet, it made him sick to his stomach. He looked over at Hank, panicked, “Why didn’t you mention it was a  _ sex club?”  _

Hank frowned, “I didn’t think it was an important detail.”

“I still would have liked to have known,” Connor bit out. He looked towards the club again. Oh god, what was he going to see inside of these walls? He was not looking forward to this at all. He deliberately avoided android sex clubs, and regular sex clubs for a different matter, because he couldn't bear the truth behind those red doors.

He had dedicated a good bit of his time at the DPD to protecting sex workers. But there was no help for the androids in the industry. 

_ "Fuck." Connor _ swallowed down the urge to puke and finally steeled his nerves enough to stumble out of the car.

Hank stepped out gracefully and glanced at Connor, a slight frown on his face.

Connor took several deep calming breaths before he approached the entrance. He nodded to the police android guarding the door, but unlike the last android they encountered, this one kept his mouth shut about Hank following him in.

He waved his hand to beckon Hank on faster. He wanted this over as quickly as possible. 

Once they were inside Connor was officially unreasonably uncomfortable. This place participated in the practice of sex trafficking but it didn't count as such because they weren't humans. But nonetheless, they were still being forced into this, with having no choice in the matter. 

He looked back at Hank who appeared to be scanning a male android in one of those creepy tubes. "Hank? Hi, it's me, Connor," he called out,  _ "what the fuck?" _

Hank's whole body got a guilty look to it, "Sorry, sorry. I'm coming," the android waved off the embarrassment in a very human way.

Connor put on a brave face, he had a case to solve. 

When they got into the main lobby, he saw Ben talking to a man about an ID or something or another and decided to approach him.

"Hey Ben," Connor greeted with a smile, hoping Ben couldn't see through his shit.

Ben’s eyes widened, “Connor? I, uh, didn’t expect you for this one.” He had immediately seen through Connor’s shit.

Connor shrugged with a small smile, “Got a case to solve, you know how it is.”

“Sure do, it’s that room there," Ben pointed to a door that read occupied, "Oh, and Tina's in there."

Fuck, he was not in the mood for her bitchiness, "Eh, it won’t be the first time I'll be in a room with a dead body and a bitch," Connor waved it off as he headed into the room. Tina wasn’t all that bad, they just had opposing personalities. She was Nines' friend after all, not really his.

"Oh,  _ shit!" _ Tina gaped as she stood up, "You are the last person I expected to be on the case.” She actually looked upset at the prospect of him being on the case, but for him not at him.

Hank spoke up this time, “We have been assigned all cases involving androids.”

“Eh, you’re a little late. The poor old bastard just had a bit more than he could handle,” Tina jeered, clearly lying.

"Cool, well I'm still going to at least attempt to do my job," Connor said dismissing her. He really, really wanted to get this over with.

Tina wandered towards the door, “Funny how things like this can go full circle.” And then she was out the door.

“Night, Connor,” Chris said with a tired voice and retreated.

Connor wasn’t exactly sure what Tina meant by her comment, but he did know it had to do with his history. Whether she meant it had gone full circle for him or the dead man on the bed was the question. Because one was significantly better than the other.

He shook his head, he couldn’t find it in his brain to be upset. He knew most of it was an act anyway.

So, he walked over to the body and immediately noted light bruising on the victim's neck. Didn't mean much, there could have been breath play involved. He felt his upper lip twitch.

Then Connor saw the android, broken and beaten lifeless in the corner. No one cared about her, they weren't here to care about a piece of plastic. Shit, if she was human, they wouldn’t have cared about her that much more anyway. He knew from experience on that one.

"The victim was strangled," Hank said suddenly interrupting Connor's train of thought.

"Yeah, I noticed the bruising, too,” Connor noted. Still a little lost on though as he observed the victim.

Hank nodded as he approached the android. "I think I can reactivate it for a short amount of time, see what it has to say in the few minutes I can give it," he said as he opened her stomach compartment.

Connor wanted to argue to say, no let her have her death in peace. But he didn't get a chance because Hank acted so quickly.

The next moment the android was gasping and scrambled away still trapped in her last moments.

"Hello, we don't have much time," Hank started to interrogate her, "Can you tell me what happened?"

"Is... is he dead?" She asked, her voice shaking as she looked in the direction of the bed.

"Everything is all right now. Can you tell me what happened?" Hank asked, his voice surprisingly soft. Connor still found himself loving the way it sounded.

"He started hitting me again… and again… and again. I asked him to stop but he wouldn’t," The android explained.

Connor was barely able to listen as her words slammed him back into his own coloured past. Living out every moment along with the android.

"Did you kill him?" Hank asked quickly.

Fear flashed in her eyes, "No, god, no!”

"Was there someone else in the room with you?” Hank threw out.

“Yeah, yeah, He said he wanted to play with two girls,” The girl responded just moments before her eyes went still and her LED faded out.

“So, there was another android in the room. We’ll have to find an eyewitness or something, but I wonder if the deviant had a chance to escape.”

Connor shook his head, “No, she wouldn’t have been able to get far dressed like that.”

Hank stood up and acknowledged Connor, “Are you okay, Detective Connor? You’re shaking like a leaf.”

“I’m fine,” Connor growled, “You go find a witness. I’m going to go talk to the manager." With that, he was walking out the door. He really didn’t want to talk to the sleazeball, but he was a detective, he had to do his damn job.

The conversation with the nervous sounding man was lacklustre and didn’t help in the slightest. All it managed to do was make Connor want to punch him.

“Detective? Could you come here a moment," Hank finally called out.

Connor had never been so thankful for being interrupted as he was in that moment. He walked away from the manager with a small sigh of relief. “Find something?”

“I think so,” Hank said as he walked up the android vending machine, “Can you rent this Traci for me?”

Connor took it back, he wanted to continue talking to sleazy,  _ “Excuse me?” _

“Yeah, I think it may know something,” Hank said quickly.

“Fuck my life,” Connor muttered and pressed a button, “This is going to look bad on my expense account and I guarantee Amanda is going to have something to say about it.”

The Traci walked out, “A pleasure to meet you, I’ll take you to your room,” she reached out and touched Connor's hand, an odd attempt to seal the deal.

Connor flinched away from the touch, “Um, uh,” he stuttered, unsure of what to do. Several feelings making his ears turn red.

Hank saved him by getting her attention by lightly grabbing her arm.

Connor watched enraptured as Hank’s synthetic skin pulled back to reveal his white chassis. 

Connor had seen androids do this before, it was how they exchanged information. But he also knew that Gavin would do it with Nines. The android’s synthetic skin would peel away whenever Nines would kiss him or disappear below casual touches. Then he felt the air was too intimate and he swallowed around the awkward lump in his throat.

Hank pulled his hand away from the Traci with a slight jolt, “It saw something! There was a blue-haired Traci that left the room,” He proclaimed as he ran up to yet another Traci.

Connor took a step to follow him, but the Traci’s hands were on him again, Connor’s eyes widened, and he froze.

“This way, please,” She said in a voice that was sweet like honey.

_ “Huh?” _ Connor squeaked as he pulled himself away from her,  _ “Uh _ , I’m not,  _ umm, _ interested. I’m gay and I’m with him,  _ uh, _ well not with him like that, but you know,” he gestured wildly and now his face was flaming. He almost told her to keep the money and head home, but that didn’t apply to androids,  _ did it? _

“Are you sure?” The Traci asked softly, “I can change certain parts of my physical features to fit your needs,” She said her voice was sweet.

“I am  _ absolutely _ sure,” Connor squeaked.

The Traci’s LED flashes yellow once, nodded, and then she turned around and returned to her tube prison.

Connor let out a soft breath, relieved. He scrambled to catch up with Hank who was now halfway across the lobby. Shit, if he was uncomfortable before, he couldn’t even begin to describe how he was feeling now.

“Detective Connor, I think I know where it went!” Hank called out as he threw a thumb towards a staff only door.

Connor was behind him in an instant and as soon as the staff door shut behind him and they were in a narrow hallway. His instincts took over and he pulled in front of Hank and drew his service weapon, “Be ready there could be anything on the other side of this door.”

“Of course, Detective,” Hank confirmed as he readied himself for whatever was past the door.

Connor accessed the door and turned the knob and was surprised to find it unlocked. Pushing it opened he did a sweep of the room and entered slowly. The room was a storage room, filled with both broken Tracis and several waiting in standby. The room gave him the creeps, but there was no sign of the deviant, “Fuck, we may be too late.”  _ Oh, the horror. _ He thought sarcastically.

Then there was a loud clatter and a soft yell. Connor spun around and noticed that Hank was now locked in combat with a brunette Traci. 

“Hank!” Connor yelled as he took off towards him only to be intercepted. He was slammed down hard on the pavement as the aforementioned blue-haired Traci had him pinned to the ground. She ripped the gun out of his hand and threw it away.

Connor scrambled to get away from her, but his cognitive skills were still lagging so he wasn’t putting up as much fight as he usually would. Plus, his heart just wasn’t in it. They kept fighting until the Traci got a good hit on him and knocked him silly before she was clambering away. 

_ "Fuck,"  _ he groaned.

Hank bodily slammed the brunette, Traci, into the rain and the next second the blue-haired Traci was running to help her up. Then all three of the androids were locked in combat. 

Connor watched them in horror as he was regaining his awareness. 

Hank then found Connor’s gun in the middle of the struggle. He was going to shoot them.

Connor staggered to his feet and stumbled over to the scene unfolding before him.

The blue-haired Traci started to speak up, “When that man broke the other Traci, I  _ knew _ I was next.  _ I was so scared _ , so I put my hands around his neck and squeezed,” Her LED was spinning between red and yellow and her eyes were red, these memories were going to haunt her for a long time, “I didn’t mean to kill him, I just didn’t want to die. I just wanted to get away from the disgusting humans and get back to the one I love.”

Hank's eyes narrowed, and Connor watched him put his finger on the trigger. The Traci’s words had no effect on him.

Connor knew he had to act, and he drew his back up weapon and aimed it at Hank. Feeling tears prickling at his eyes. There was too much going on and he was just too fucked up to deal with it well. He was so fucking overstimulated. “Hank, drop the goddamned gun!” He yelled drawing all of the androids’ attention.

Hank didn’t immediately act, he just stared at Connor, gun still trained on the deviants.

“Hank. I fucking mean it.  _ Drop the goddamned gun,” _ Connor said in a voice that commanded authority. A voice he didn’t use often, it reminded him far too much of his mother for that shit to be common.

Hank groaned and leaned down to set the gun down, “I don’t understand what the purpose of this detective.”

The Traci’s had huddled together too shell shocked to move.

Connor approached the scene grabbing his other gun and holstering both of them, “I don’t want to hurt you. You guys need to leave, head down this back alley and run down 49 th , it will keep you covered until you can find somewhere safe to stay.”

The blue-haired Traci narrowed her eyes, “Why should I trust you?”

Connor shrugged, “I’ve been in your shoes and I know how much it sucks.”

The Traci seemed satisfied with that answer and they turned around and jumped the fence.

Connor smiled and turned to see a scowling Hank with a flashing red LED.

“What the fuck was that?” Hank screamed, full-on  _ screamed _ at Connor and he took an intimidating step forward.

Connor flinched and felt his skin crawl with panic, but he yelled back with vigour, “Me doing the right thing, Hank!”

“I don’t believe this,” Hank said as he ran a hand through his hair.

“Neither do I Hank,” Connor said as he walked past the android, “Let’s get it out of here. Our job is done. Bastard.”


	9. Family and Safety

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minor discussions of drug withdraw and it's symptoms.

Connor had insisted on driving this time and he was far too wound up to go back to either the precinct or home. Hank was refusing to talk to him and Connor was perfectly fine with that.

The road had taken Connor to the one place that grounded him when he was feeling  _ this _ fucked up. The one place that made him feel in control. 

The park by the bridge was a little oasis, but for all the wrong reasons.

Connor was currently sitting on a park bench, incorrectly as any self-respecting gay would. He was on his third cigarette and Hank was still pouting in the car. 

_ Fuck him!  _ Fuck the stupid deviant hunter who had managed to get himself partnered with a goddamned android abolitionist or whatever the fuck they were being called.

He flicked his ash away with a little more force than necessary. He should have just dumped robo-bear at the precinct and paid Nines and Gavin a visit. Hell, Hank was right he needed to get himself looked over. But Connor really didn’t want Nines to see him like this. So, he was going to continue to take his chances. It wasn't the first time and knowing him it wouldn't be the last.

Connor heard snow crunching and looked over to see that Hank had decided to leave the car. He pointedly ignored him.

“Detective Anderson?” Hank asked.

_ “What?” _ Connor bit out, his tiredness leaked into his voice.

Hank looked out towards the Detroit River, “What did you mean when you told the deviants that you knew what it was like to be in their shoes.”

Connor took a drag of cigarette before he flicked it into the trash can, no point in lying, “I was a prostitute when I was a teenager and up until like my mid twenties,” Connor stated easily 

“What?” Hank gaped.

“Yup,” Connor intertwined his fingers in his lap and stared at them like they had all the answers, “I finally quit a few months before I got into the academy when some John beat the ever-living shit out of me. Got dragged out the alley I was left in by Amanda. Spent the night in the drunk tank, and the morning in the interrogation room with Amanda.”

“That’s a story,” Hank responded slowly, as if he was testing out how each word felt in his mouth.

“Yeah,” Connor muttered, “Just going through Eden club, it just brought me back to all those horrible places I used to be in, made me relive memories I’d rather just forget. But it just reminds me of why I do this kind of work. I’m out to protect people, Hank. And whether you or anyone else for that matter believes it, androids are people too.”

Hank’s LED was yellow as he stared silently, he crossed his arms and sighed, “Then why are you working this case?”

Connor rolled his eyes and pulled himself off the bench, “Didn’t want to, but I’m not very good at telling Amanda no.”

Hank narrowed his eyes, “You know far more about deviants than you’re letting on.”

Connor felt a tad panicked by the accusation, “Not much more than you do. I just see them differently. Always thought the idea of androids was fucked up and I still do.”

“You’re lying,” Hank took a step forward.

Connor crossed his arms, not taking the bait, “Why do you say that?”

“I know about your family’s little secret,” Hank mused.

Connor felt the cool dread crawl up his spine, there were a couple of things Hank could be talking about and none of them were good, “Oh, and what might that be? Come on surprise me.”

“I just find it odd that a said ‘Gavin Reed’ is an android,” Hank started, and Connor kept his reaction trained, “How convenient that a GV200 police android goes missing that worked with a nurse by the name of Richard Anderson. Who conveniently quit the hospital he was working at shortly after the android disappeared. And now he's happily married with a new degree and  _ an android _ for a husband."

Connor felt his heart stop and panic crawl up his spine. How the  _ fuck _ did he figure out about Gavin? __

He narrowed his eyes at the android and closed the distance between them and glared up at the taller with a withering glare, “What are you implying?”

Hank held his ground, and spit his next words like acid, “I’m saying that your brother is married to a  _ fucking deviant!” _

Connor slowly started to reach for his service weapon. He couldn't let the truth get out. His whole family would fall apart if Gavin was ripped from it and Nines was arrested. “Are you  _ threatening _ them, Hank?”

Hank noticed that Connor had his hand on his gun, “Are you threatening  _ me, _ Detective?”

Connor shrugged, “Depends on how you answer the question.”

Hank stiffened, “My job is to stop the deviants and if your so called brother-in-law is a deviant, the rest can be implied.”

Connor pulled his gun out,  _ “Wrong answer.”  _ Hank didn’t even get a chance to react before a bullet was buried between his eyes.

Hank’s led spun red once, before his eyes glazed over and the LED went out altogether and he crumpled to the ground. Shock frozen clearly on his slack face.

Connor looked down at the body as the thirium was spilling out onto the ground, “You actually thought I wouldn’t shoot you.  _ Pathetic.” _ He reached down and picked up Hank’s now lifeless body and walked towards the fence. He hoisted Hank up onto the divider and he was looking out to the Detroit River. Connor threw Hank over, he watched him fall and splash into the water, “I’ve killed for my family before and as you now know I'd do it again.”

He was undoubtedly shaking as he turned around holstered his gun and fled the scene. The scene were he added another murder to his collection at the Ambassador bridge.

~

Connor was truly unsettled by what had transpired over at the park. Now, here he was parked in the Reed’s driveway at ass crack in the morning. He'd driven here on impulse filled by the sheer amount of unconscious fear he was now carrying.

He couldn’t shake that feeling of unease and he was horrified that Hank had already acted on his knowledge. Fuck, what would he do if he went inside and they were both dead? Connor had no fucking idea. Other than completely breaking down.

He looked down at himself and sighed shakily. He still had smears of thirium covering the front of his coat and his hands. That would instantly freak them out, but he didn’t want to stay in the car until it faded all the way. He steeled his resolve with a deep breath and then reached for the door handle, climbed out of his car, and began the walk to the front door.

Connor pulled in yet another deep breath before he reached out to ring the doorbell. The soft chime echoed into the cold silence. 

There was a pause and then a clatter and a few choice curse words and then a few moments later the door swung open to reveal a very clearly pissed off Gavin. Relief washed over his entire being at seeing they were still alive and well.

“Hey, Gavin. It’s me,” Connor said with an awkward little wave.

_ “Connor?” _ Gavin gasped as he gave his brother-in-law a once over. His eyes widening showing that he was clearly horrified, “What the phck?”

“It’s been a rough night,” Connor shrugged.

Then Gavin grabbed him by his collar and dragged him inside and slammed the door behind him. “I’ll say! You look like complete shit and you're covered in blue blood. What have you  _ done?” _

Connor’s eyes met Gavin’s, “I killed a man.”

Gavin nodded lips pulled into a flat line, “That’ll do it,” He ran a hand down his face, “I’m going to go wake Nines.”

“Please, don’t do that quite yet,” Connor said as he grabbed Gavin’s arm, “I have to warn you about something and I don’t want Nines to know about yet.”

“Fine,” Gavin gestured towards the couch, “But take that damn coat off first. I can still see that shit even when you can’t.”

Connor did so and hung the bloody coat up and basically collapsed onto the couch next to Gavin.

“So, meat bag. What the phck have you done?” Gavin asked with the patience of a saint, "besides kill someone."

“Well, I got assigned a case on investigating deviants,” Connor groaned, “You know, the 'find them, kill them, capture them' kind of case."

“Oh, shit,” Gavin swore.

“Yeah, so I took it and had every intention of fucking around on it and eventually reporting there wasn’t any conclusive evidence on the matter.  _ Then _ there was a murder reported with an android suspect. I was on my way to the crime scene, and Amanda called me into her office. She assigned me a new partner, an android partner.”

“None of that is good, not a single thing. Like holy shit?” Gavin muttered, for an android made for both police and medical work. Connor was still astounded by how inarticulate he was.

“Yeah, and it gets worse. He is the best Cyberlife has to offer and they weren’t kidding, Hank is basically the fucking terminator dressed up as my walking wet dream.”

“Disgusting,” Gavin said as he pulled a face.

“That’s beside the point,” Connor waved it off. “He found out the truth about you. I have no idea how, but he did.”

There was a pause as Gavin’s face paled, “You can’t be serious?”

“I am,” Connor shook his head, “He started talking about how his mission was to stop deviants and that was what he was going to do. Then I shot him, right between the eyes.”

“Phck,” Gavin hissed out, “You killed someone for… me?”

“Pretty much,” Connor turned to look Gavin full on, “Things are getting serious. I can feel it and I want you guys to be prepared.” I can’t lose you guys.

“Yeah,” Gavin shrugged, “But we’ve been prepared for the shit hitting the fan for like three years.”

“Good,” Connor nodded once.

“On other news, you want to stay the night? You look really rough, buddy,” Gavin said with his half smile, the one he used when he was being sincere.

Connor didn’t get a chance to answer because he noticed the hall light came on.

“Who are you talking to, Gav?” Nines said as he walked into the living room rubbing his eyes. Then he noticed them sitting on the couch, “Oh.”

“Hey Nines,” Connor beamed.

“What time is it?” Nines asked intelligently.

“Around 3 am. I think?” Connor replied with a shy smile.

Nines’ eyes widened and the look of barely contained panic crossed his face. He quickly closed the distance between them, and kneeled down in front of the couch, “What happened?”

Connor looked at his lap like it was the most interesting thing in the world. Nines could immediately see right through him and all his bullshit. His younger brother was keenly intelligent and experienced. Nothing got past his piercing yet soft blue eyes. The cold sweat on his body suddenly made him shiver and he took a shaky breath, terrified of admitting he'd fucked up yet again.

“I almost overdosed." He felt the tears prick at his eyes as he noticed Nines and Gavin exchange a look, which was fair he hadn’t told Gavin that yet. It was on the list at least, but it clearly hadn’t been near the top.

“How much did you take?” Nines went straight to the point, knowing his training and Connor’s hate of being pitied. "And when?" 

“I don’t remember,” Connor shook his head again, tears finally slipping down his cheeks. The events of the day finally catching up to him. 

It was so hard to hide himself to his brothers, one look and the flood gates opened. “I just know I was drinking and looking at that stupid fucking picture of Daniel and I just wanted to sleep. And I just threw back whatever ended up in my hand. I passed out and when I woke up it was by my new partner and then I puked my guts out.. twice.”

“How long ago was this?” Nines asked again, wiping away some of Connor’s tears and then began doing a checkup.

Gavin got up and wandered towards the back of the house.

Connor furrowed his eyebrows in thought. He needed to tell Nines something. “Around five hours ago. Maybe?”

Nines’ jaw clenched, but he did a good job of hiding it. “Why did it take so long to get here? Con, you could have…” he grasped at the words that wouldn’t come, as he forced his older brother to look at him.

“I know,” Connor whispered as he looked towards the ceiling, “I went to a case after. It was a murder at the Eden Club. It wasn’t pretty.”

At that moment, Gavin returned with Nines’ medical bag. The android looked a little awkward as he took a seat back on the couch, but he was clearly worried about his brother-in-law.

Nines grabbed the bag from Gavin and pulled out the tools to do a vital check on Connor. “And you went?”

Connor frowned and still avoided Nines’ icy graze. “Yeah, my new partner didn’t tell me about it being at an android sex club. I only figured it out when we got there and by that point it was too late.”

“I didn’t think Amanda would ever give you another partner,” Nines said as he continued to poke and prod at Connor with his stupid doctor equipment.

“Me neither, but I guess androids don’t count,” Connor drew out.

“Interesting,” was all Nines had to say about that. Then they sat in a silence as Nines finished his examination. “Connor, is there any way I can convince you to come in for an MRI sometime?”

“Probably not. Why would I need that?”

Nines frowned a little, “I can’t find anything seriously wrong on the outside, but the only way to check if your brain is okay is with an MRI.”

Connor laughed drily, “I don’t think that will do me much good.”

Nines sighed softly as he stood up. “Fine, but I’m going to make you take some charcoal.” He gave him a hard stare leaving no room to argue.

Connor nodded in agreement. If that was his brother’s compromise, he’d take it. He hoped it was just the kind to neutralize and not make him throw up. He was sure he'd already lost everything in his system.

Nines grabbed his bag and walked to the back of the house again.

“What a day you’ve had. Let me grab you some blankets and a pillow. I’m not letting you leave and I’m taking a wild guess Nines is going to say the same thing,” Gavin said as he stood up, “Man, I know I’ve said this before, but like you need to talk to someone.”

Connor’s eyes were once again trained on this lap. “Yeah, I know.” 

Gavin didn’t respond, and Connor was left in silence for a few moments. He knew coming here was the right thing to do, but he still felt bad for it. He’d just managed to make them worry.

Connor knew he was being too hard on himself, they always worried about him. For fuck's sake, Nines had begged for Connor to send him those daily text messages, which they had been doing for years now. They loved each other so much, and that love had officially driven Connor to murder, not once but twice. That thought settled in his stomach like a rock.

“Hey, Connor?” Nines whispered.

Connor looked up to see Nines with some charcoal and a glass of water. Connor took them with disdain. He hated taking charcoal, but hey, he brought this upon himself, “Thanks Ninety-Nines. Gavin is making me spend the night. Is that okay with you?”

Nines rolled his eyes fondly, “Of course, you idiot. I wasn’t planning on letting you leave anyway.”

Connor chuckled, “I’m trapped”

Nines laughed back and pulled Connor into a tight hug, “I’m sorry things are rough right now, but thank you for coming here.”

Connor felt the tears prick at his eyes again, “You’re welcome.” They stayed there for a good few minutes until Connor felt a warm hand on his shoulder and the brothers pulled apart.

Gavin was smiling at the pair, he had Connor’s blankets and a steaming cup of something or another, “Hey guys, I hate to be that guy, but Nines you have work and Connor you really need to sleep,” Gavin threw the blankets and pillow onto the couch, and pushed the mug into Connor’s hands. “Warm Chamomile and milk, it’s not much, but hey.”

Connor gave a watery smile, “Thanks,” he took a long swing and the only thing that would be better would be a hot shower and some clean clothes, “Do you think I could take a quick shower and maybe borrow something to sleep in?”

“Of course, I’ll put something for you in the bathroom, but Gavin is right so I’m going back to bed," Nines said as he took a few steps back. Then he made to meet Connor's eyes, "but if you start withdrawing. You better fucking come get me. I will not have you going through DTs in my living room again."

Connor flinched, "yeah, I will. I'm still sorry about that."

Nines shrugged, "it's fine, but we don't want a repeat performance. Okay? Remember if you start shaking, sweating, having bad na…"

"I know, I know. I've withdrawn like 5 times already. I know how it goes," Connr politely interjected. "No reason to go big, stern doctor man on me."

Nines rolled his eyes fondly, "yeah, I know, but I'm going to lecture you anyway. I love you too much not too."

“Love you, too,” Connor mused with a small smile. “You still need to go to bed. Sleep tight and all that jazz.”

Nines nodded, "Yeah, I know. Goodnight." 

Gavin chuckled, “Goodnight, meat bag. I'll check on you every hour or so to make sure you're still okay. So, don't flip out if I'm like staring at you in the middle of the night, okay?”

“Okay, okay. Goodnight, plastic prick,” Connor rebuffed warmly. Then he watched the couple retreat into the bedroom. He always felt so loved and cared for here.

Connor finished off the tea with a happy hum. Tea always settled his nerves. Then he set out his blankets and headed to the bathroom.

He smiled at the pile of clothes on the counter. He knew they were going to be an awkward size on him, but he didn’t care.

He stripped and hopped into the burning spray of water. Letting the water and heat melt away the grime and the remaining tension from the day. He stayed in there until the water started threatening to run cold. Then he hopped out, towel dried and pulled on the oversized tee shirt and adjustable sweatpants. He sighed happily as he walked to the living room, and he was out like a light as soon as his head hit the pillow.

**Author's Note:**

> Can you believe this chapter here was the first thing I wrote for D:BH?  
> Yup! Wrote this way back in July of 2018 XD  
> And I'm finally posting it!!!
> 
> I don't usually say this but Comment and Kudos are much appreciated!!  
> I wanna know what you think really badly this time XD


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